Do you know what you want and need? That's a question anyone about to enter into a new relationship should answer. The more you know, the higher your potential for happiness and satisfaction. Perhaps, more importantly, the less relationship red flags you will overlook.
On the topic of red flags, everybody is bound to be on the lookout for ones that are specific to their own preferences. Yet, across the board, there are those that everyone needs to watch out for. Not sure what those are? Let’s list them down below:
Couples who agree to be monogamous should never tolerate cheating of any kind—whether physical or emotional. While there are gray areas that each couple will need to navigate and discuss on their own, any outright crossing of lines is unconscionable. Even if forgiveness is in the cards for a straying partner, cheating creates damage that few can ever completely undo.
Whether it is physical, mental, emotional, or sexual, abuse of any kind is another glaring red flag. What’s dangerous about this isn’t just the direct damage it can do to one’s body and mind, but how subtle it often is. Those who are victims of their own partners may not even consider themselves abused at times. If that isn’t scary, then I don’t know what is.
Oftentimes, all it takes to ruin lives is one bad habit. While many bad habits are easy to change with enough effort, it becomes far more daunting to try and reverse a partner’s attachment to drugs or alcohol. Many fail utterly in the effort, so this is one case of prevention being better than a cure.
On a lighter note, there are those with less damaging bad qualities. Yet, of all the so-called harmless qualities, a flakey partner can be among the most annoying and disappointing. If major plans are frequently canceled or if there is a strong history of disappearing and reappearing, then this is definitely one blatant red flag to spot from afar and avoid.
Going back to the question at the start—what do you want and need? It goes without saying that people tend to want and need different things. As overwhelming as the feelings of love and lust can be at first, don’t let that fool you into thinking things will turn out alright. Chances are, they won’t because of the simple fact that you are just too incompatible with your lover.
There is such a thing as healthy conflict, where pressing issues get resolved and the relationship is made stronger. However, it cannot be expected for all fights to be healthy and if you and your partner constantly find yourselves in conflict, then that points to larger issues. While not a red flag in itself, it could very well lead towards that territory if it isn’t fixed.
Differences between couples are unavoidable. No matter how much and how well you communicate or how much you are willing to compromise to make things work. What matters is that you know how to identify the major issues—the relationship red flags that can break couples apart if left unchecked.
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